Wednesday, 6 January 2010

mysterious goings on at the local school

no one could work out what was going on at the local school. it was a mystery. the children were acting out of character. the staff of the school were scared of the students.

it was satanism.

but no one knew that.

except for the children who were major-league satanists.

it started with simple things: Crucifixes being turned upside down. Pictures of goats being scrawled all over everything that wasn't a picture of a goat. Five pointed stars being painted on the wall in arcane fluids.

no one could work it out so they called in the police. the police were stumped. they called for the best investigator in the whole country, inspector gorth. gorth was a very old man who was close to death. he always wears the same coat. it is a grey trenchcoat that he has owned for around 50 years. it has a patina of grease and grime and wax. it is indestructible.

gorth is destructible. when he arrived he paced around the school for five days and then said, 'this is way bigger than any of us.'

then he died from dramatic feeling. he was overcome with a tense and dramatic feeling and it clogged up his veins and made his heart explode! his second in command was so upset that he started crying.

the fbi came over from america and couldn't work out was going on at the satanist school. the children all wore moustaches and rich red velvet robes. it was 100% satanic. eventually everyone lost interest because it was just too mysterious. what a boring and long-winded story about satanic children!

one of the children was the ring leader but he was never caught. he is still at large today or is he?


4 comments:

Cami said...

I die of dramatic feeling every day.

DJ Berndt said...

haha, this is near perfect.

Marvin K. Mooney said...

We are inside the schools. They cannot find us. We are found only by you.

Crispin Best said...

this is amazing