Thursday, 7 February 2008

Feeling Great

I am quite the optimist. Some people say the glass is half full. I don't have any glasses. I always try and have a great time. Today I am in work - I am sitting at the pod. My team mates are all around me - they are on the pod. A phone rings. Team mate 1 answers the phone. He is the quickest team mate. His finger is thick and bulbous from always answering the phone first. Team mate 4 is making a tube while waiting for the phone to ring. He is the best at making tubes. His tubes are strong and long, longer than anyone elses. Team mate 1 and team mate 4 are going places. They are the quickest and most skillfull. My head is plugged into a phone. When I press the button on my phone it makes a noise in my head. The three button on the phone does not work. If I want the phone to dial three Ihave to press button 1 followed by button2 with an interval of exactly half a second between the presses. My boss calls me into the room. Between us on the table there is a cake. This cake represents you he says. You are the cake he says. Do you know what that means he says. No I say. He shits on the cake. Eat the cake he says. I can't do it I say. That's why you will never be a manager he says. I walk home from work and buy a cake. I'm at home with the cake. I do not want to shit on the cake. Idon't want to shit onthe cake. I am the cake?


xtx said...

i don't think you are the cake.

i think your boss is the cake. it was a power thing. he wanted you to eat a representation of himself which is a 'shit covered self'. This means he doesn't feel very good about himself. If you ate the cake that would mean you accept the boss despite his feelings of worthlessness.

in not eating the cake you rejected him.

he probably went home and flaggelated himself repeatedly while naked from the waist up.

there were no candles lit.

Socrates Adams-Florou said...

If Ibake the cake and I am the cake does that make me God?

apants said...

I think your job is the cake. As in, "this job is a piece of cake." That is a saying we say in America, do you say that in Angleland? And your boss is the shit, as in "My boss is a piece of shit" and you are the work, as in "You are a real piece of work." And I am the way. I can walk on water and I can raise the dead. Its easy.

chris killen said...

shit on the cake.

apants said...

yeah, cake it on. Get the shit really caked on there good.

Frank Morgan said...

you know where you can stick that shitty cake florou, yeah you know.

plus, pretty much what xtx said.

you made the right decision, now shit on the new cake, bend one out like a cumberland sausage.