Thursday, 6 March 2008


I lie sprawled on my bed. My body feels uncomfortable but I do not want to move it. My mind is trapped at the moment, I feel like I am in the centre of a venn diagram. My brain lies in the middle of a venn diagram. I am being hung drawn and quartered by the parts of the venn diagram. I have been socialising with my television. I have been watching a programme on the television about a group of people. When someone finishes a sentence I press the mute button. I then reply to them. After my reply I unmute the television. This is a conversation. I have been doing this for two hours. While I do it I have been crushing garlic. I have been rubbing the crushed garlic into my chest. This is an ancient remedy for a cold. The garlic is seriously hurting my skin - perhaps in the olden days people had thicker skin. I smell terrible. I think that I am wretched, I am fairly sure that you could definately call me a wretch. I think the garlic is giving me hallucinations. I am on a television panel comedy show. It is my turn to speak. Clement Freud is sardonic he is too sardonic for me. I am not sarcastic enough I laugh too easily there is no bite to my humour. The studio audience is looking at me with distaste. I feel like they might want to eat me. I see some one in the audience wink at me. It is Anthony Worrall Thompson. He holds up a card with a red pepper printed on it. He is having sex with Gok Wan. He is smacking Gok Wan on the bum with the card. Gok wan is smiling a lovely smile.

I think about my life and why this is happening. I don't know why this is happening.


apants said...

television conversation is my favorite now forever.

ALso, who are those english people names? I need to look that up and I am too busy for that.

Gok Wan I know though because I am a nerd.

ALso, suck it.

Socrates Adams-Florou said...

Anthony WT is a crumpled faced celebrity chef with a nasal face. Clement Freud is an aged sardonic comedian who is the (great) grandson of Sigmund Freud or something.

I am scared of both of them.

Socrates Adams-Florou said...

Nasal face should say nasal voice.